Moneywise

I recently listened to a CD about learning to avoid materialism, and then today at church I listened to a lesson on becoming financially secure. There were a few ideas that really stuck. I used to think that the amount of money you make determines your financial security and to a certain point your peace of mind. I think I was wrong.

When we moved here, our income rose quite a bit, and we started to live the good life. I bought whatever we wanted from the grocery store, we ate out at all the restaurants in town (of course, that isn't too hard to do). We bought a bunch of nice new furniture, put new carpet in the house, traveled like we never had before, got cable and unlimited long-distance..... We were making more money, and we could do whatever we wanted...I thought.

After two years of this I realized that we were living on the edge of our income and were carrying a balance on our credit card each month. We managed to pay the balance each month, but then we were cash-poor and couldn't pay that months' bills without putting a few expenses on the credit card. The red flags started coming out, and I realized that something drastically needed to change.

I called my sister who has always been good at managing her money and asked how she did her budget. I wish I had learned her plan back when I was in college. I think it would have benefited me and I wouldn't have wasted as much money on frivolous things. I'm just grateful that we learned our lesson earlier than later. We started living on our budget and in three months we got our credit cards paid off. Then we started getting our savings built up. I learned that all the possessions and dinners out don't compensate for the stress that comes from being in debt. It was such a liberating feeling to stop worrying about how we were going to make the next months payments.

I've learned that it's not how much money you make but how you spend it that matters. I think we don't need to feel bad for having "things" but we should enjoy them and appreciate them. Also, we should share what we have with others.

A friend of mind told me a story today about when she was growing up. They lived in a trailer for a while with only one room for 8 kids. The kids all shared one large mattress. She said her mom made her feel special by putting their pictures up on the wall and making them all their own special pillow case. I know plenty of kids who have every toy imaginable and aren't any happier than this girl with her family.

I am trying to simplify our life and our home and decide what is most important and what is of little consequence. When we have too many "things" to preoccupy us, we spend less time with our family. I would rather have less things to clean up and more time to read with my children.

Recently we bought a new car to fit our growing family. It felt really good to pay for it without taking on new debt. I regret some of the purchases I made in the past, and hope that I have learned my lesson. I'm going to really try to enjoy what we have without coveting those around me, give thanks in all things, and be generous with those who have unmet needs.

Traditionally Speaking

I've decided that most traditions in our family come about from our children. They decide when they like something and declare it a tradition. For instance, several months ago the kids were asking Nathan to make chocolate chip cookies, since he is the master of chocolate chip cookies. He told them he would on the next Fast Sunday. After that they started expecting chocolate chip cookies every Fast Sunday. "It's a tradition," they claimed.

Friday night is always movie night/pizza night/treat night. It is devastating for them if they discover we will have different plans on a Friday night. We have started to run out of good movies that everyone likes these days, as a 12 year old boy has quite different tastes than a 5 year old girl.
Christmas season is bursting with traditions. It starts when we go as a family the day after Thanksgiving to cut our own Christmas tree. We get a tall one to reach the top of our vaulted ceiling. Then we have a Fondue party the first Sunday of December before we watch the First Presidency Christmas fireside. We make cookies to hang on the tree and go caroling for a couple of nights. We sing around the tree every night and draw names for giving family members gifts. I think it is our traditions that turn what could be a bleak time of year into a warm inviting season.

We start each school year with a Father's blessing for all the kids. We have a tradition of reading that extends from earlier generations. We end the school year with the kids throwing away their workbooks and a deep-cleaning of the house. (I'm getting excited for this particular tradition, as the house is in a pretty scary shape.)

We have written in our kids journals every week for the first year of their lives and monthly after that until they are eight. At that point they are big enough to take over. Nathan writes in their voices and those are their favorite entries. They are starting to help write in Danielle's journal and are so excited to carry on that particular tradition.

Nathan has told the kids bedtime stories every night since Brandon was 3 years old. There is such a maze of characters and plots after 9 years of continuous stories, but they always start with a "knock at the door."

We eat breakfast, lunch and dinner as a family and try to have family prayer and scripture study every day. We enjoy family jokes and humor on a daily basis. They kids particularly like to "pun"-ish us.

We bless our babies when they are a couple months old and baptize them after their eighth birthday. We embarked on a new tradition this weekend. Danielle was blessed on the same day that Brandon received the priesthood. Grandpa Frey was with us for the occasion. It's a good new tradition.